Friday, September 5, 2008

Wow

I will just start by saying I have had one of the most difficult weeks that I have had in a long time. I started a new schedule at school so I have to be at work at 7:30 in the morning. The time change has been hard on myself as well as Parker. She has been used to sleeping until she wants to wake up but now I'm having to get her up earlier and she is going to bed a little earlier as well. Parker is still adjusting to not being home with me everyday and instead staying in daycare so that has been hard as well. The upside to where I work is that I can go and see Parker whenever I want. After my lunch, I spend probably 45 minutes to an hour with her, just hanging out. The downside is that I have to leave her again and we aren't together all day long. Every night this week, she has cried constantly from the time I have picked her up from her classroom until she goes to bed at 8 o'clock. Finally, last night, I couldn't handle it anymore and broke down. I believe it is because I feel extremely guilty for going back to work and not spending as much time with Parker. I know she will adjust soon and things will be fine but it is absolutely difficult at this point.

Saying that, I have been hard on myself but today as I was looking into Parker' s mouth, I noticed she had two molars coming in on the bottom, as well as, a a tooth coming in on the top. I'm not a genius, but I do think that these teeth have something to do with her attitude change. I'm not for sure why I never even thought to check her mouth but I'm a slow mom. It just took me a week. She hasn't been eating as well as not acting like her sweet and cute self. I don't feel as bad but after spending the whole day trying to "teach" and corral four year olds, a person just really doesn't have the patience for their own child to be screaming non stop at home too!

All and all, the week is over and I have the weekend to spend with Parker giving her as much love as humanly possible. I'm hoping I can do some relaxing as well! My birthday is coming up soon, 26 I know, and so I'm trying to mentally prepare myself for that well. I'm blessed to have such a wonderful husband who was there to help me through this week and my nervous breakdowns! He did all the small things just to make me feel better about my parenting skills. I love you Jeff!! So I'm hoping and praying that next week is a fresh beginning and the sun will finally shine!

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